The top 3 reasons why this whole transgender bathroom issue scares me as a mom: they may not be what you think they should be.

We are talking about this in our house. Is North Carolina right in passing their law that people must use the bathroom that corresponds with their gender at birth?  Do the 11 states now suing the Obama administration’s protection of the civil rights of transgender students have a point?

This whole fucking issue scares the crap out of me, as a mom. And here’s why.

  1.  My kids are being exposed to MORE ignorance on a daily basis. Everywhere!

Are you scared some sexual predator will come in to the ladies room and molest your eight year old if transgender people can use the bathroom they identify with? The person can just say that they identify as a woman, and go in there?

a) If your child is too young to protect themselves from bad people of ANY gender, they are too young to be going into a bathroom alone! Period. If you let them, you are dumb.

b) If we go by North Carolina’s law that we use bathrooms assigned to us based on our gender at birth, doesn’t that mean some sexual predator can molest our children (who YOU have let go into that bathroom alone), because he LOOKS like a man—but says he was a woman at birth?  How would you freaking know, are we going to have to carry a birth certificate around to pee in public from now on?

Neither one of those arguments hold any water (excuse the obscure pun), yet ignorant people all over the country are making those arguments and forcing them on us throughout social media, and making this an issue in government and the news. Stop exposing my kids to your stupidity, please.

2. This issue is setting civil rights back half a century.

As a modern mother, I am trying to teach my kids about tolerance of others. To be tolerant and nonjudgmental of EVERYONE; regardless of race, religion, sexual orientation, gender, creed, etc…just like our anti-discrimination laws say we should. We no longer segregate schools and bathrooms based on color, exactly as we should. Why are we going back in time and trying to segregate people based on how they dress or whether they would like to be addressed as Sir or Ma’am? I am trying to teach my kids to show respect to everyone, to do that for humanity…and you are fucking it all up with your discriminatory comments and bias.

  1. This issue is taking focus away from far more important issues.

Like maybe poverty? Like how children are starving right here in the good ol’ USA? Or, maybe, bullying in schools and the rising statistics of children committing suicide in America? The plight of the homeless? Child abuse and neglect? Those are the issues that are true threats to our safety, not whether someone chooses a bathroom with urinals instead of without.  I’d much rather be having conversations about these REAL issues that are REAL threats to the welfare of society, than deflecting the bullshit that is being thrown at my kids right now. There are so many other things wrong, things that we can fix, that we can focus our energy on and teach our kids about. Why does this one basic human rights issue have to be forefront?

I’m pretty angry about it. I feel helpless about it, and frustrated, as I’m trying to decide how to help my kids understand the issue and help them make informed opinions. I guess that I will have to try to teach them tolerance of a new group: the ignorant. Our humanitarianism will simply have to be extended to include them, as well.

If I’m not able to do THAT, then everything I’m trying to teach them is moot.



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